Freestyle

In long:

Freestyle rap, poetry, flo-etry…whatever you want to call it, it is a beautiful thing to behold. The art of spontaneously poeticizing one’s thoughts and observations into a beautiful, rhythmic, and allegorical narrative is, I think, a very spiritual practice. God created the universe with his words, in the moment (“Let there be light”). While we must all engage in forethought and diligent preparation (and wisely so), when we transcend into the ‘flow’ of a moment, every fiber of our being engaged in the here-and-now of a creative passion, I believe we have indeed set foot on holy ground.

In an effort to set down some roots in that ground and feel its dirt between my toes, I am challenging myself to learn the art of freestyle and to be somewhat decent at the craft by this time next year. There are risks, to be sure: the potential for looking foolish, fumbling through dead-air, and falling on my face is abundant. I am no stranger to such possibilities- we have become well acquainted within the safety and solitude of notebooks where a simple scribbling of the pen or turning of the page is all it takes to erase the memory of a failed attempt. Yet such fears have claimed too many casualties among the dreams and passions of creatives throughout history, confining them behind the bars of lined pages that will never be read or locked in cages of innermost thoughts that will never be heard, spoken, sung. Freestyle swings wide the closet doors and pulls the creative struggle between one’s fear and potential out into the open, allowing it to play out in real time where the former is revealed to be smaller and the latter to be deeper than they seemed when they were shrouded in darkness.

This isn’t just about learning freestyle rap, this is about freeing hostages.

The fear of failure hovers like a cloud over this project. I am sure that I will rack up an impressively high score of failed attempts. This is a good thing. My hope is to meet this fear often. So often that my paralysis and flight-response to its presence wears off. So often that I can learn its ways and see what makes it tick. So often that I no longer lose my grip and back down from the mere mention of its name or the sound of its approach. Doing so will effectively subdue that fear, converting it from menace to mentor, terror to teacher. In the same way that God coached Cain that, “Sin is crouching at your door. It desires to have you, but you must master it”, I feel that God is coaching me to meet this fear and reclaim the turf it has stolen for far too long.

In addition to consistency, there is another set of tools in the arsenal that can shackle fear with boundaries and limitations: nerdy stats! By naming and quantifying my goal, the power of fear likewise becomes numbered and, in so doing, reduced. No longer does fear have the advantage of casting illusions as a mythical leviathan lurking in the shadows. Rather it’s exact height, length, and depth are revealed to embarrassingly small, shrinking with every new step towards the goal.

So what are those nerdy stats? How do you objectively measure something as subjective as rap? Good question. For me, I suppose this comes down to the matrix of values by which I evaluate the rap artists that I admire. Those that I consider to be successful at their craft are marked by five proficiencies:

1. Meaningful lyrics

2. Continuity of lyrical ideas

3. Rhythmic vocal delivery (flow)

4. Clever rhyme schemes

5. Confident performance (presence)

I will give myself a rating for each of these on a scale of 1-5 (the higher the better) and track the average score in each skill category. The average across all of these areas will serve as my overall ‘score’ as a rapper. These are, of course, highly subjective measurements. Lyrics or rhyme schemes that are meaningful to me might not hold the same weight for you. That’s why I’m asking you to join my panel of judges! Along with recordings of all my attempts (made public here and on YouTube), you will find a link to a form where you can fill out a score card for that performance. As a result, my ratings will reflect a cross-section of the audience, rather than my own one-sided opinion. To keep things interesting, I’ll tackle different thematic challenges throughout the year.

This will be challenging for sure. It will be embarrassing. It will be fun. It will be liberating. But I don’t want to do it alone. Join me! Yes, please follow me on this journey and give me your ratings. But why not do it with me? Why not give the challenges a go for yourself and post your attempts in response? The more, the merrier!

I start this journey on Sunday February 3rd. I embark on this journey with excitement and confidence amid voices of self-doubt and second-guessing; a swirling combination that I’ve learned tends to precede awesome things. Join me! Let’s follow the trail together.